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May 17, 2009 // 1:30 am - Velvet Assassin Review by Shummyr:

Name of Game: Velvet Assassin
Publisher: SouthPeak Interactive
Release Date: 4/28/2009
Genre: Action, Adventure
Player: 1
Buy/Don't: No
Overall Rating: 1.0
Platforms: XBox 360 and PC

Lets start out by stating this game is possibly the worst game I have ever played/reviewed!!!

You're a British Secret Agent who has to destroy and assassinate key political and military targets.

The AI in the game is so dumb, but dead-on when they go to shoot you. Her sneaking thing is sluggish and inconsistent, the hype was worth it but the game was a huge letdown.

There's not a very big selection of weapons and ammo is scarce at best. Its extremely difficult, slow and tedious. The graphics are horrible, and I've seen better PS1 and Gameboy games that were more interactive and fun.

Now you are probably asking would I buy this game? No, I would not because the gameplay is horrible, the controls are sluggish, or plain flat do not work. As mentioned above, the sneaking thing is terrible and the enemies can see you as if you were walking up to them and ammo is nearly in non-existant.

The levels are the same and repetitive, all you do is find the shiny key and complete the objectives over and over.

Note: This review was based on the XBox 360 version

Shummyr (Desert Rat Game Review)


• Graphics, gameplay, terrible and repetitive story.
• Scarce guns and ammos
• Bad graphics and controls are non existant

Graphics - 1.0 - Terrible. I've Seen Better PS1 and Gameboy games!
Sound - 1.0
Gameplay - 1.0 - Terrible Graphics and Controls. The sneaking thing does not work at all.. You could walk up to the enemies and it would be the same thing.
Fun Factor - 1.0 - Negative, the worst game I have ever played, it deserves negative 10.
Online - N/A
Overall - 1.0 (out of 10 / not an average)

Review: Velvet Assassin Video Game

Review: Velvet Assassin Video Game

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#5 - djcopey - May 18, 2009 // 12:30 am
djcopey's Avatar
It wasn't too bad a game, in my opinion it was an average game give it about a 3ish out of 10 i'd much prefer an aggressive fps of running up and shooting and less of trying to be stealthy, but i thought it wasn't too bad a game.

#4 - mrgreaper - May 17, 2009 // 11:40 am
mrgreaper's Avatar
i played this one on xbox360 so it may be different.

I agree the game is crud, the stealth mechanics are there but as you say slugish but the major problem is the lack of options in routes, you always feel hurded one way. Also the morphine mode was just stupid and in VERY poor taste giving what happened to the real allied agent this game is based on (Violette Szaba).

the graphics however were early ps3/360 graphics not so bad as to be ps2/xbox graphics but not up to par with todays standards.

#3 - SUBTAGIOUS - May 17, 2009 // 10:23 am
I have played the game. I was a bit dubious about Germans writing a game about the English kicking Germans ass.

The Girl comes from Devon. Nice to put Devon on the map, Sold it for me as that is where I am from.

I think the scoring maybe a bit harsh. I have only done the first level, and not played it since, I have given this game to a friend who has got further into it, although he is complaining of being stuck.

The graphics are not to bad, the game is about stealth, so it depends on what type of games you are into. I could never play any of the hitman series so I wasn't expecting to play this, but I have and I though it was ok.

If your rich then buy it if your not then don't. Maybe wait until it's being almost given away.

#2 - jjp93 - May 17, 2009 // 9:12 am
jjp93's Avatar
well that kinda sucks

#1 - PS4 News - May 17, 2009 // 8:40 am
PS4 News's Avatar
This is one to stay away from indeed. I added your review to our Reviews archive here and +Rep!